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Still here! [Sep. 14th, 2005|09:09 pm]
The plan went to rat shit last week though. Still haven't burned through my character studies. I let life get in the way, as it tends to. Current plan is for Friday night now... over a week late. I suck. No cookie!!!

Not much news... got free tickets to see The Rat Pack last week though... hilarious! For those who don't know, it's a West End show that recreates one of the Las Vegas shows that Sinatra and his crew did. Jo got some free tickets through the hospital, and even though I wasn't really a big fan of that kind of music, who am I to turn down free tickets? (the pair would normally have set us back eight quid) My god it was a good laugh! Highly recommend it if anyone gets the opportunity to see it.

My research on the Franklin thing is still going well, enjoying the relaxed studying. But must concentrate on the the WIP... MUST MUST MUST!
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Goal Update [Sep. 5th, 2005|12:57 pm]
Draft outline done! Yay!

It's crappy! Boo!

Still, this is what the word draft means. This week I'm going to get the characters sorted and adjust the outline appropriately, hope the final part sorts itself out after I know what everyone's names are and the like.

1) Initial outline from beginning to the end, done by next weekend (midnight 4th Sept)
2) Detailed Character Outlines for principal characters done by Wednesday night (7 Sept, Midnight)
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A Few Good Men [Aug. 29th, 2005|11:30 am]
Great little play! We got some good seats in the Stalls with really good views (not too sure about the people behind me! I did my best to skootch down, but I'm pretty tall). Rob Lowe and 'That chick from Coronation Street' were very good. I was a little dissapointed with the guy playing Jessop... seemed a bit camp... but given my only frame of reference for his character is the film, the man has to live up to Jack Nicholson.

Given Jessop is the kind of character who is allowed to eat the scenery ("YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!"), Jack absolutely owns the role, making it tricky to compare him to anyone. Still, all in all I felt Jessop was a little... camp. Not quite what they were going for.

Still, good night. It's not often I take advantage of being in London and catching plays and things, so made a nice change!
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Research and Writing [Aug. 24th, 2005|09:09 pm]
So, I'm in the final stages of world building for the sci-fi thing that I'm going to start writing, need to sketch out an outline and get going. Will set some deadlines, publish them here to try and get myself motivated.

Simple one to begin with.

1) Initial outline from beginning to the end, done by next weekend (midnight 4th Sept).

Got an idea germinating for a story based on the North West Passage and the stuff that people went through to find it. Nothing even close to resembling a plot yet, but the disappearance of the Franklin expedition seems to have a few stories in it. I've decided to target my reading around this aim so I've drawn up a list of books that might be interesting and some subjects that I would need to know about if I'm going to write something in the year 1845. I don't expect to get through that lot anytime soon, so it gives me room to write the other.

Not much happening otherwise... going to go see A Few Good Men at the theatre at the weekend... and I've signed myself up for the Saturday and the Monday shift (really need the money this month).
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I do not have spider sense! [Aug. 2nd, 2005|09:23 pm]
Still itchy going on the tube. I'm still subconsciously picking seats where I think "If I was a suicide bomber, I wouldn't bomb this carriage" (because that'll work!). I still tend to scan everyone that gets on the train. I still tend to be nervous as the doors close me into that tunnel.

I said in a previous post, that I still have to go to work and I'm sure this feeling will ease down... even if there are more attacks. What is puzzling me is my... instincts lately.

Twice now, since 7/7 , I've let a train go past that I just didn't feel right about, I've got off a stop early on a couple of occasions too (did it yesterday in fact). Mostly because I didn't feel comfortable on that train.

Bloody irritating and stupid. Because as a skeptical atheist, this is like... the closest I can to a damned sin, you know? God doesn't exist. There is no cosmic force guiding me. I have no Extra Sensory Perception or telekinetic powers. Fate may well be pre-ordained but there's sure as hell no way I'm going to be able to decipher it on the number 133 bus.

These things are as fictional as Peter Parker's Spider-Sense. So, I've decided that I either have to acknowledge I have Spider-Sense... or I just have to buckle down and ignore these stupid feelings. Given I can't climb walls or shoot webs out of my wrists... I'm going to assume that I'm just being irrational.

Trivial rambling little post, sorry! Just thought I'd share!
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Detours and Delays [Jul. 21st, 2005|07:42 pm]
Buggers! Oval tube station (one of the 'bomb' sites) is one my way home. I had to do that part on foot... and they've closed off such a massive area around Oval station that I got completely turned around by the time I walked around the exclusion circle and ended up in Brixton (a good half mile east of where I was aiming for!)

Home now. Marvelling at the idiocy of this latest batch of bombers. I think I tend to agree with feath and think that it is most likely low grade troublemakers or BNP shit stirrers.

I just know it took me an hour and a quarter to get home this evening and a good (and uneccessary portion) of that was on foot!
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Photo Spammage! [Jul. 17th, 2005|10:47 pm]
Saturday was a good laugh. One of Jo's friends had an anniversary bash thingy on a faux Paddle Steamer boat going up and down the Thames. Good laugh, even if it was one of those parties where I didn't really know anyone there.

Four piccies out of the ones I took. I hate my digital camera. Need better zoom and better night shooting abilities. Everything after a certain point became a big black blob. :(

Read more...Collapse )
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(no subject) [Jul. 13th, 2005|06:26 pm]
They cordoned off the area around my work today, suspect package. Turned out to be nothing but people are still jumpy, despite learning that the bombers are dead.

It was quite shocking to learn these guys were suicide bombers. Surprising too, I figured the reason for the relatively low number of casualties (before anyone has a go at me... one single bomb could easily kill more than 52 people on my daily commute at the right time) was simply because they were timed devices, placed when there were still plenty of people on the system but not enough to risk wandering eyes spotting the packages.

I read a theory that one of the bombers (the bus guy) wanted to use the Northern line, probably going to head up to Camden Town. The whole reason *I* didn't go in on the 7th was because the Northern line was broken, overrunning engineering works. Which 'scuppered that plan for the suicide bomber, his radicalised brainwashing procedure didn't really leave him with the creative faculties to adapt to the inefficiencies of the worst mass transit system in the world. Confused him so much he got the highly unfamous No 30 from Hackney instead and blew up an hour later.

I'm not wishing for better suicide bombers, obviously... but I find it hard to believe that these four have been trained or even prepared for this by anything even close to professionals, but they obviously had access to high grade explosives, since the latest forensic tests say the bombs weren't homemade. Guess we'll know more in the days to come.
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On fear and reason [Jul. 8th, 2005|12:45 am]
[mood |hopefulhopeful]

I've always been a coward at heart. I don't know why, but whenever the going gets tough, whenever there is a tough situation that demands fight or flight... I always fly. There's a horrible gnawing fear that crawls inside me like some kind of worm and it paralyses me at the worst possible moments. This spills out into my day to day life, as I tend to stress about forthcoming situations that I know will be difficult, because I know I'm going to have to face that thing in my gut and I know invariably I will lose. It makes me irritable, angry with seemingly nothing as I only I can see the chain of events that make me rage against the possible future I know I will not be man enough to deal with.

And yet, tomorrow, I'm going to get on the London Underground and travel into town, I'm going to go shopping, I need to get Jo her birthday presents, need to make her return from Plymouth something nice, since her birthday has been marred by the horrible events of the day. Next week I'm going to commute to work like I always do, I'm going to get off at Moorgate station, and move up through the tight, claustrophobic corridors of the station, a few yards from where dozens of people where killed and injured today. I'll eat my lunch on the steps of the station which was used as a temporary hospital for the victims after they were pulled to safety. I'll go about my day to day life in a place that today was turned into something resembling a battlefield.

I'm not a brave man. I've already said this. But I'm a reasonable, calculating man. 700 people? In a transport system ferrying 3 - 8 million bodies a day? Those are pathetic odds, not even worth squirming about. They could kill three or four times as much and you still couldn't make those odds practically fearsome. I stand more chance of being hit by a car than being killed by a terrorist... yet I don't tremble every time I cross the road.

I work hard, I earn my money to keep me and mine warm and fed and safe. I cannot stop work, I can't just stay in the house and not go anywhere. I'd be unemployed, and hungry and alone. On top of that, this town is in my blood now. I love London, flaws and all, as I've said in the past, and I certainly wouldn't replace it to live elsewhere just because occasionally terrorists tend to use it as a playground. So I have no choice, I have to commute, I have to use the system in which 38 people died today.

I'm going to use it tomorrow.

And I'm not afraid. And I'm an inveterate coward, who passes every challenge up that I safely can out of fear. I cannot pass this challenge up. The odds of injury are so small it's not even really a challenge. As a result... I'm not afraid. And if I'm not afraid - me, a huge coward - what chance do these terrorists really stand? None.

They are weak minded fools who cannot handle the factual realities of the world around them as it has been explained to them so incontrovertibly in the past century. Instead of exploring the opportunities and trying to develop themselves, they seek solace in superstition and delusion, allowing themselves to be brainwashed and trained by other people, because anything is better for them than facing up to the fact that we are all responsible for our own actions and that our miserable lot on this planet is all we get so we'd better make it a worthwhile one. Anything is better than actually thinking for yourself. Sheep.

And I'm certainly not going to let sheep tell me what to do.

Have a safe trip tomorrow everyone.
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(no subject) [Jul. 7th, 2005|01:42 pm]
Moorgate... that's my work tube station.
Russell Square... that's Jo's.

She's in Plymouth and I decided to have a lie in today. Went down the road with the intention of going into town but as the Northern Line was broken (unrelated to all this, happened before) I decided to go home and get a few hours kip.

Wake up to 12 messages on my mobile phone, including ones from a frantic Jo and a frantic Mum. Scary stuff.
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